‘I only went out for a walk and finally concluded to stay out till sundown, for going out, I found, was really going in.’ – John Muir
Zen
Roll up the mat
Yoga is the meeting of mind and body. It’s a way of life. Being in a studio with like minded people is a powerful way to practice. But what happens when class is over and you plug back into the life’s demands and pressures?
When class is over, lie down in Savasana – lie on your back, with arms and legs are spread out like a snow angel, close your eyes and breath deeply. Relax and let your mind wander. Unchain the brain. Imagine letting a dog off the lead at the beach and watch it sprint towards the waves – your brain will react in the same way.
After a while, slowly standup and re-engage with the sights and sounds of the day. Your next moves set the tone for the rest of the day. A lot of people jump up, crumple up their mat and hurry out. I do it from time to time too when I’m distracted, anxious and am already living in the future.
Stay in the moment and set the tone with how your matt is rolled: Stand up straight after savasana, relax the shoulders and jaw. Now tighten your tummy and bum, and do a slow forward bend towards your mat. Pick it up from one end and start to roll it. It doesn’t have to be at a snail’s pace, it’s about the intention to focus, do a good job. Rolling the mat keeps you in the yoga mindset, and makes you focus on the task at hand. It gets you out of your head, stops you from checking the phone or thinking about the next thing waiting for you. It also prepares you for the next class with a nicely rolled mat and makes set up for the next class easy.
Roll up the mat after class and continue the yoga outside of the studio.
Looking and Learning
Traveling keeps me sharp, on my toes and exercises my curiosity muscle. My eyes are wide open, always looking and learning. Where’s the ferry? Where’s the train? How do I buy tickets? Where do I stand? Am I going in the correct direction? What’s the weather like this evening? Where can I swim? Where do I eat? How much does that cost? What’s that accent? Friend or foe?
Travel also makes me grateful for the every day well worn rituals of home. After the intense stimulation of the unknown, returning home is like laying on my back in Savasana and breathing in the moment.
Activate Low Power Mode
The iPhone now has a low power mode setting. Switch it on and you disable your phone’s most higher energy features. It switches Mail from push to fetch, turns off automatic downloads and disables background app refreshes. In low power mode you get to choose where and when you expend your phone’s battery energy. It’s an underrated feature and I use it all the time, even when my battery is fully charged. Instead of calling it Low Power Mode, I call it Low Energy Suck Mode
Do the same thing with your mind and body. Activate Low Energy Suck Mode today. In this mode, you decide where and when to spend your time and energy. It turns off those coffee meet ups you should say no to and says no to people who guilt and manipulate you into giving up precious time with family and friends. Low Energy Suck Mode preserves your energy so you can decide when you choose to direct energy at someone or something. Your energy is sacred and you need protect it. When focused and at full power it’s loving and wonderful.
Activity Low Energy Suck Mode today. You’ll have more energy at the end of the day and less drag from things you don’t need.
Don’t Skip The Rituals
Rituals and healthy routines like exercise, stretching, conscious breathing, yoga and healthy eating are easy to keep when you aren’t busy. The real test kicks in when you get busy and get pulled in five directions. Maybe it’s work stuff like 10 unread emails on your phone, or rain during the morning commute or an important meeting and presentation.
The busier you get the more discipline is required to stick to your rituals and routines because they will help you manage the daily grind and stop the stress from accumulating. It’s crazy how many people sacrifice themselves and let work take precedent. What ends up happening is that both work quality and the person suffer. If you are more grounded, fit and rested then you will execute better. It’s easy to forget.
Slow down, breath, smile and look after yourself. You have more time than you think. Don’t skip the rituals.
Happiness is an Horizon
People build happiness destinations for themselves like ‘when I have a enough money then I’ll be happy, ‘when I meet the right person then I’ll be happy’, ‘when I’m living in a new city then I’ll be happy’ – you know the drill. The construct is that happiness is achieved when certain milestones are hit. The problem is that happiness is like an horizon, it keeps moving away as you move towards it.
John Lennon said that life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.
Now think about Joy. Joy is something you experience when you are true to yourself in work, love and life. Joy is sipping fresh coffee with a friend, walking the dog early in the morning, building something, doing a good job for someone, hugging your kid, reading Twitter, drinking a glass of wine after a long day. Maybe you picked up a pattern there…joy is a state of mind. Joy is to be present and living in the moment.
Forget about happiness horizons and enJOY the journey now.
The freedom to choose
There are so many gems in this Viktor Krankl interview. My father reminded me of it today and it’s worth the 30 minutes if you are looking learn more about about meaning & purpose. It’s a simple message:
He talks about how people react to unchangeable events. When these events are out of our control, it’s how we choose to react determines our happiness.
Don’t forget, you have the freedom to choose how you react to everything and everyone you encounter each day.
Isn’t that great?
The space to pause, breath and choose
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom” – Viktor E. Frankl
This advice can be applied in any every day situations like traffic, a long security line at an airport meetings, the dinner table or interacting with colleagues and customers in a high pressure meeting. Every interaction you have with something else is an opportunity to grow and ask yourself how you would like to respond.
If you haven’t already read it. I’d highly recommend reading Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl. It’s worth revisiting every so often for guidance into the meaning of life and why a lesson and opportunity to grow is available everywhere we look.
Good Citizens and Mercenaries
Teddy Roosevelt said, “The first requisite of a good citizen in this Republic of ours is that he shall be able and willing to pull his weight.” A Good Citizen properly fulfills his or her role as a citizen.
A mercenary takes part in a battle, but is not a national or a party to the conflict and is motivated to take part in the hostilities by the desire for private gain.
People, not product, will determine the success or failure of a company. You can have an excellent product and fail because you’ve assembled the wrong team. Building a business at scale is hard. It’s fraught with uncertainty, highs, lows, wins and losses. It’s an emotional roller coaster. Good citizens roll up their sleeves when there’s work to be done. They pitch up every day and are in service to each other. Mercenaries leave if it’s about anything but themselves.
The list of GC attributes I look for when building a team:
Compassionate
Collaborative
Curious
Comfortable with uncertainty and mystery. They feed off it and enjoy it
Cocky in a kind way
Gritty
Impatient
Kind
Loyal
Persistent
Pragmatic
Polite
Persuasive
Zen
Pointers for spotting a GC:
They use ‘we’ and “our” a lot when talking about solving problems
They laugh at themselves
Pedigree & degrees don’t matter. It’s about what you can offer now and in the future
They have a history of execution and getting things done
They listen more than they speak
They are self-aware
They are black belts in verbal judo. The best answer always wins the tussle
They ask for feedback, welcome it, and act on it
They have detractors. Probably a couple of bullies they’ve stood up to in the past
They respect the people they work with and are friends with them
They are rewarded and recognized by their peers
They offer up reference checks from peers and previous investors/partners
They treat interviews like a two-way street and ask questions about the team, motivations and product
They seek you out, vs. running away from their current role or company
They have hobbies outside of work
Ad hominem is not an option
They are comfortable making decisions with incomplete data
The understand the importance of luck, timing and preparedness
They are always learning, experimenting, tinkering & tweaking
Titles don’t matter
So what’s the opposite of a GC?
In my experience it’s the Mercenary. The are seductive, because they get things done, but don’t be fooled – when the going gets tough and it’s time to contribute to the greater good and sacrifice something…they leave.
Attributes that pop up time and time again:
Bully
Blamer
Bitter
Charming
“Lone wolf”
Rude
Short tenures and long stories
How to spot them:
They use “I” and “they” when describing their current role and company
They describe past and present colleagues as ninkanpoops/clueless/tone deaf/opaque/idiots/blind/wrong/lazy
They hold grudges
They “get things done” through coercion and intimidation
They stereotype people and roles
They don’t believe in luck and good timing. It’s all about talent & A players
They are “Remember whens” – “remember when” is the lowest form of conversation. They dwell on the past, live in the world of what was instead of understanding that things change and you need to move forward. (The Sopranos Season 6, Ep 15)
Listen for phrases like:
They don’t listen to me
It’s them not me
I don’t have the resources
It’s not my responsibility
You need me
I inherited that problem
My team wasn’t big enough
They wouldn’t promote me
I told them, but nobody listened
Give me people a chance to change
Everyone can change, and I’ve seen it happen many times. Sometimes Mercenaries become GCs and even inspiring presidents, but if it looks like a goat and sounds like a goat it normally is a goat.
Happy hiring!
Family holidays – Priceless moments
I’m off to my brother’s wedding in a couple of weeks. It will be the first time my immediate family has been together since 2006. Getting together these days can get a bit pricey and off course means taking time off from the daily gig, but I never hesitate. Thinking about this made me reflect on our priceless family trips over the years.
A road trip in my family included piling four young kids and two parents into a Volkswagen microbus, and trekking off across the country. Sometimes it was a 2000-mile round trip to a National Park or a maybe it was a 100okm trip to Cape Town and back to pick up a new puppy. This was before the days of AirBnB or VRBO, so my folks would organize pit stops and accommodation along the way. Sometimes these stops were at family friends and sometimes they were in roadside hotels. Normally it was one room with all of us piled in, and sometimes it was two rooms with my sister and parents in one, and brothers and me in the other. If we were in the bush and I was sharing with my brothers then I’d go sleep with them telling me the hyenas had broken through the fence and I would be eaten first.
Most stops along the way involved unpacking the car, taking family pictures with my dad’s beloved Nikon and exploring our new accommodations. It was exciting winding down a dirt road towards a small dark farmhouse or checking into a hotel at 9pm at night. As a kid I had no concept of time or space other than the road ahead, dinner (probably sweet corn on toast) and which bed I’d be sleeping in that night. Picking beds with older brothers involved my mother’s intervention once the younger brother (me) was told his bed was the mattress on the floor next to the door.
A highlight on these road trips was sitting up front with my dad in the passenger driver seat, wearing the seatbelt while studiously paging through a well used road atlas. My father had a rule – you had to be a certain height before you could sit up front so that the seat belt would cross your chest and not your neck when you were sitting upright.
A couple of times the car would overheat and we’d limp into a small Karoo town garage in the middle of nowhere. Remember this was before cell phones, so if we broke down on the road then we flagged someone down for help. A roadside stop for us would mean target practice with my older brothers, by throwing stones at anything that looked like a target, irritating my little sister or just waiting around watching cars go by. I never doubted for a second it was a permanent breakdown…sooner or later we piled back into the car and moved on to the next adventure. Only now do I appreciate how my parents must have stressed about getting the car fixed, the delayed schedule, keeping us fed and occupied…remember no cell phone to contact the hosts awaiting your arrival.
As a family we still laugh about these trips. Whether it was Yosemite when we got lost in back country trying to find the Hetch Hetchy valley or finding a cockroach in a bowl of soup in a small back country hotel in Pilgrems Rest. Most of the time it was the unplanned events along the way that keep us laughing.
I remember a return trip from a National Park and setting up “camp” in a small town in the middle of nowhere. We were all piled into one room and it was so cold we all put multiple layers of clothes on and slept next to each other to warm up. I don’t know what my parents were thinking but I was having the time of my life…it was so exciting. We were freezing cold but everyone was laughing and trying to keep warm. My mom told me later they woke us up at 4am and left because the car was warmer. We were all still wearing 3 or 4 layers of clothing and headed to the gas station to fill up with petrol. At the pump next to us there was a farmer filling up his truck…and he was wearing shorts and a t-shirt. We still talk about that cold morning and laugh about the “farmer at the gas station”.
These memories are the glue that binds my family together. It’s the small moments we still laugh about years later.
Looking back I think my parents were probably a little nuts and naive to pile 4 kids into a microbus and drive across the country, but I’m glad they were and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
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