Life is like a video game. You only get to move to the next level when you master the level you are on. Each new level has a higher degree of difficulty. More difficult challenges get thrown at you, and there’s more work and learning. You’ll backslide and get frustrated, but that means you are on the right track. It means you are growing.

To grow, you have to do the work!

In life, doing the work means confronting your anger, fear, and prejudices that are activated when things get hard and the pressure is on.

Anger, fear, and hate are a cover for sadness and trauma. When you are ready, be brave and courageous. Go deep, and explore your anxiety. Seek out the sadness.

Finding sadness is like striking gold. It means you are on the right path. But this path is narrow and full of danger. It will be tempting to run away and hide.

Now comes the paradox. You can’t fix the sadness on your own. So what do you do? The more you try to repair, ignore, distract, and control your grief, the harder it gets.

So, when you are done fighting and running away, when you are exhausted, and at the lowest of the low, then it’s time for the magic. It’s time to surrender and ask for help. It’s like in those martial arts movies where the Kung-fu master breaks down the student until the student forgets what he has been taught and is ready to listen and learn. When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.

The door unlocks when you surrender and stop trying to control everything. That’s when the love and light come in. Love has been there all along, but you need to be willing to open the door.

In that surrender comes the healing. And the way to heal is to love and help others and be in service to the greater good. It doesn’t help sitting on a hill meditating, you’ve got to roll up your sleeves and serve others.

Look for guides, sherpas and teachers along the way. They are waiting for you with signposts and broad shoulders. They know the way up the mountain and have come back down to help you. I’ve had many very patient teachers and guides who helped me in ways I’ve seen and not seen.

Start doing the work and show us the way.

“To love another person is to see the face of God.”

Victor Hugo