The right amount of skepticism means that you are humble enough and experienced enough to admit that there is never 100% certainty in an endeavor. Too much skepticism will paralyze you by thinking only about what could go wrong.
Be an optimistic realist.
The answer is in the dirt. The devil is in the detail.
Go deep on stuff and the answers appear. If you are too high level then you won’t break through. Don’t be a jack of all trades and a master of none.
Going deep is a differentiator and is underestimated. Simplicty appears on the other side of complexity.
“The closer you get to real matter, rock, air, fire and wood, boy, the more spiritual the world is.” – Jack Kerouac
Learn to spot a no or a slow maybe. Whether it’s a sale, career opportunity, promotion, application or a negotiation. The quicker you identify the no, the faster you can move onto investing in a yes.
Avoid caffeine after lunch. Take it easy on the wine.
Avoid screen time before bed. No Netflix, no Twitter, no email, no Book of Face, no quick flip through Instagram.
Don’t binge watch Netflix in bed.
If you wake up in the middle of the night, resist the urge to fire up your phone. Reading the news, catching up on work, looking at a picture is an adrenalin injection. Not useful if you want to get back into a deep sleep.
Read a book, even if it’s one chapter before bed. Do paper, not Kindle.
Download your brain before bed.
Don’t use your phone as an alarm clock. Get one of those old-school clock radios with a dim light.
Turn your phone on airplane mode. It removes all the vibrating and alerts.
Stick to the same routine. Get up at the same time, go to bed at the same time. Keep the schedule on weekends and vacation.
Dark rooms equal better sleep.
Keep the room cool. Your body temperature drops at night, and it’s confusing if the heat is cranking.
Stretch before bed. The ritual will get you back into your body and start the wind-down.
Exercise daily. Keep a routine.
Breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dine like a pauper. Large dinner will keep you up at night. Don’t eat right before bed either. Give your body some time to settle before getting into bed.
If you can’t sleep then surrender to it. Give up, get up and out of bed. Fold laundry, clean the house, wash dishes, write, feed the cat. Don’t just lie there and fight insomnia. You’ll only get anxious.
The magical thing that I’ve discovered about immigrating is that new friends become family. Especially new friends with the shared experience of migrating and starting over from nothing. The flip side is that new friends are different to old friends. Old friends have decades of context and the shared experience of growing up together.
I think that’s why siblings fill that void for a lot of immigrant families. The bond I share with my siblings is that we held each other’s hands and jumped into the unknown together. Taking our past with us while embracing the new unknown.
When someone wishes you good luck for an interview, a first date, a new job, or a big meeting and tells you to just be yourself, they mean it!
“The snow goose need not bathe to make itself white. Neither need you do anything but be yourself.” ― Lao Tzu
The truth will set you free, but first, it will make you miserable.
The first step to freedom is disillusionment. After you are disillusioned, then the withdrawal sets in. The symptoms are the pain, fear, anger, sadness, doubt, and remorse. If you can make it through and not be seduced back in by all of the things that promise fulfillment like money, status, appearance, the need to be loved then you’ll be free.
They talk fast and don’t say anything.
There are lots of words and no action.
They are confident and wrong.
They have no close friends or long relationships.
They have short tenures.
There is a disconnect between digital persona and real life.
It’s never yes or no. There’s always a story.
It’s never their fault.
They saved the day.
The left when the going got rough.
They never say they just don’t know.
A good friend shared this piece with me. I can’t find the source, so please let me know, and I’ll attribute and link to the original.
markbartels.org 